is that the tip of my finger in that rare roast beef?

who needs the kumbh mela

I know, you have no idea what the 'kumbh mela" is. Or at least many of you don't know. It is a gathering every four years at four different cities, HOLY cities, along the Ganges. Somewhere around 30 to 40 million people come to bathe in the holy waters. Next year, it is in Hardwar. and for my 60th birthday, I REALLY want to go. In the meantime, I have the Sunday and Monday, absolutely-out-of-their-minds, i-need-beef*chicken*cheese*whatever!!!!, 3 hour-can't catch my breath-let alone wipe my nose, cooked-flesh and dairy-products-flying-off-the-slicer-filling-the-store-give-me-more("i only have 2 dollars, thank you")lunacy. And though I have never been, I think the Ganges bathing might actually be easier to deal with. I have never in my life seen anything like this. Nowhere. No way. No how. Not even the other supermarket that is within the same parking lot!!!!!! This is truly a pilgrimage to the "I'll wait 15 minutes til you call my number" holy shrine. I keep thinking that I will figure a way to project an image of Christ onto the back wall or maybe woodburn a Virgin Mary into a piece of colbyjack(yum) and seriously start my own church. I am not making fun of religious shrines or my customers, I am just saying there is a bit of a frenzy in the number of people on those 2 days. And really, it is not that they are in a frenzy, it is that we are trying to get their orders as quickly as possible. And what that begins to look like once the wave starts is like nothing you have seen. i promise.
On Saturdays and Sundays, you can wear your favorite team logo clothes. I changed hats 4 times on Saturday. Texas, Penn State, Colorado, and U.C.L.A. I wish i had a hat that says "ANYBODY BUT USC"! On Sunday, it was all Steelers. And in this town where I am living, thems is fightin' words. One of my coworkers took the shot of me at 11p.m. No photos during the frenzy.............
but, boy do I wish I could put up a film clip.
"What can i get for you, and how would you like that sliced"?

"rainy day, dream away"

If you can, put on some Jimi or listen in your head.
When I'm telling Lauren about my day, it's so easy to describe it all and make her laugh. I can make up voices for the customers or my co-workers and take on personalities. It's harder at the computer. I need to create the visual with my words. Today is my first late shift. 3 to 11. I get to "close" which really means clean up. I'm hoping I can organize the cases for whomever is new and in the same place as me.
"Lost in the ozone"
I can't imagine there being as many different types of turkey, beef, chicken, salami, bologna, and cheese as we carry for the customers. And different manufacturers try to compete with one another, and we get to satisfy the client. Yes, I will use the word client. So much more class for someone wanting 2 dollars of "leona" or garlic bologna or buffalo chicken or white American cheese or hot souse or well done(gack) roast beef or maple coated honey smoked whatever. And they line up by the dozen sometimes just to get their packages and go home. "Don't forget the paper between the slices."
I take my breaks out in the parking lot. Sit on the wall. Watch the customers return their carts to the specified locations. Carts. Shopping carts. Here they are called "bascarts"! Are they called that in California? Did I miss something?
I get to sit for 15 minutes. maybe have a coffee. and watch. the other day, i saw a Weimaraner sitting in the shotgun seat of a car. just like a Wegman photo. He had been watching me. I actually thought he had his seat belt on. I say his, who knows what gender it was. I was so wishing I had a piece of deluxe bologna for him. As it was, the owners came. Were very friendly and gave me a treat to give him. Then on my way back into the store, I passed an SUV type vehicle with the back window open and 4 kids leaning over the back seat looking out and saying hi to all who passed. Again, like a painting. sorta Rockwell-esque.
If he had been black.

getting in shape

Okay.
So, I'm beat to sh*t. My right arm cranks back and forth so many times during the day that my belt buckle somehow moves 90 degrees to the right. I mean, 'splain that to me. My shoulder feels like i am turning into Quasimodo, and this is only day 4!!!! My feet are killing me. My legs ache. I have to squint to read the labels of these meats, and the damn bags are impossible to Zip-lok close!!!!!
So little is labeled correctly, if it is labeled at all. We're so busy I don't take my breaks or lunch. My blood sugar plummets, and my girlfriend is telling me I have to tell my dept. mgr. that I am a diabetic!!!. Oh that'll go over wonderfully. I just keep hoping to find a way that I can osmose(new word) this protein into my system just by handling the beef, pork, fowl, and you don't want to know the other stuff. Anybody ever hear of "souse"??? Maybe, Jake, you know it. You're a foodie.
BUT. I love the people I work with. We're all having soooooooooooo much fun. We're throwing away sooooooooooo much food. And the take a number machine and number button changer keep breaking because it just can't keep up. Whole Foods was NOT like this. Everything there was so systematic. Only a few people in the dept. at a time. And we had just a few products in our cases. This place...... This place..... has more turkey types. ham types. salami types. "loaf" types. cheese types. than dialects in India!!!!!!!
And I love it when a customer(and this happens all day long) comes up to the counter and asks for 2 dollars worth of turkey. Or a 1/2 pound of ham. No description. No brand name. Just an amount and a flesh type. Yum, huh? And then there's the slice description. We either ask them, show them or are requested to do it a certain way. and God protect the employee that does not give that sample as a free piece right there and then. ooooooooooo.
Today I moved the take a number machine 15 feet to the left. It was right in the space where our little aisle to the dept. is, and everyone would just congregate there. If we were in a boat, we would be listing way too much starboard.
And just across the aisle......is this pristine......high end......wonderfully delicious...... and, oh, so proper ........cheeeeeeeeese dept. In the movie, this is where the star smiles and his teeth have a reflective, bright as the sun shine.

new beginnings of old ways

Okay, peeps, here it is. My first attempt at a blog. inspired by my new job. I knew there would be tales to tell, and i wanted to share some of it as this new endeavor proceeds. all so wordy for just wanting to make you smile or think about each of our own slice of life. i've taken a job at a large supermarket chain. i am making about 1/7th an hour of what i earned as a foley artist. which means i make in one day what i made in 1 hour. duh. but it is not about the money. it is about finally creating a pattern to my life, meeting and talking with people, and putting myself out there(sort of "in harm's way"-the job could be dangerous) to be available for the next part of my life. which would take so much longer if i continued to sit at home.
i'm thinking most of you know that i moved from los angeles. and for the time being where i live or where i work is not the story. the story is about the people. and i could be almost anywhere.....in urban america.
i'm working in the deli dept., basically slicing meat or cheese for hours on end.
and the characters that are customers bring it on and bring it in !!!!!!! and those of us that satisfy their dietary needs are, for the most part, prepared. i'll talk about that later.
i'll return soon to begin the tales. enjoy your day.